Most online dating sites offer some feature or other meant to make contacting people “easier”. The generic term for these is icebreakers and they are known on individual sites as winks, pokes, kisses, flirts, etc. These features are generally free to use, making them the preferred method of communication by people who have not yet decided whether they want to subscribe to a site. They are also favoured by people who want to contact as many people as possible without putting any actual effort into it. Is it worth it? You can probably guess from the title of this page that I think they are pretty much a waste of time. Here’s why:
Being a woman and having to occasionally walk down a street or two, I sometimes come across those lovely guys who think that women like to be wooed by the sound of wolf-whistles, animal noises (what’s with that?) and various cries of “hey sexy”. I don’t. In fact, I generally end up lecturing said guys and shaming them into running away. Those guys think women enjoy the attention but what they fail to understand is that if the guy hits on every woman he sees walking down the street, the attention he gives any particular woman is not really worth much. The guy is obviously desperate and would hit on anyone. Back to the icebreakers. We all know that it only takes a second to send an icebreaker. A man (or woman) could bombard hundreds of people with these in less time that it takes to boil a cup of tea. That man (or woman) could even do it without spending any money.
Hardly makes you feel special, does it? If you are a beautiful woman with an amazing picture in your profile or an attractive man with a well-written profile, you might get some responses doing this, but then again, you would probably be getting enough attention without sending any messages out at all. If you’re not a supermodel or a movie star and want people to give you the time of day, a better strategy is to start by giving them the time of day: sign up, pay your money (assuming you are not using a free dating site) and write a personal message. You’re far more likely to get a good response then. Labels: Online dating tip: Are you still wasting your time with ice breakers? |
